Recently I was looking up some specific info for a client from our book “Assessments and Evalutions” for Dyslexics. My mother and partner, Jan Turner put this book together outlining and detailing our methods for assessing for Dyslexia. When I was going through the book I noticed an introduction that I had never paid attention to before. It was an excerpt from a Dyslexic gentleman named “Brad Elder” from one of his webpages about being Dyslexic. I was fascinated, called Jan and asked her about him. Jan said he and she had communicated for awhile a few years ago about Dyslexia. They had ideas in common and differences of opinion which she found really interesting. She said he was a really fascinating man to talk to in regards to Dyslexia, what it is to experience it and how to work with it.
I decided to track down his webpages and I found his home page and then other ones connected to it. I also Googled his name and found more. I also found many commonalities in our beliefs and approaches to Dyslexia and his list of sources are helpful and his view of the experience of Dyslexia is very moving and enlightening for those trying to understand how it feels, how to deal with it and to realize as Dyslexics we are not alone.
So I have quoted part of his home page and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. I strongly suggest you go to his other webpages and review Brad Elder’s information and sources. Also, I am trying to find a good email address or phone number for Brad. If anyone knows how to contact him, please let me know. You can email me at: email@example.com
Co-founder of Dyslexia Victoria Online
So here is my tail.
Sorry but its a little cluttered.
by Brad Elder
I have left this un spell checked so that you can see my world a little better.
Like I said this is really hard to put into words. Hard on the emotional level. But I think it will help me to do it. And I hope it will help you.
Ok, where to start. well I was diagnosed in the 6th graid. That really helped!!! It was the single biggest event in my life. Suddenly there was a name for my problem. I wasn’t lazy, or didn’t cair, or was……… what ever they called me that week. It was like the unevers was lifted off my sholders. I think I know what it must be like to slowly sufficate. I don’t know really how to describe it to you but i’ll try:
Imagen that nobody could see their hands. Everybody in the world. Nobody can see anything from the elbo down. Also assume that everybodys hands work just like thay do right now today. Now what if your hands didn’t work like “the normal hand”? What If you didn’t have any fingers? Everyone else can type, turn keys, scrach an ich, dress them sleves, tie there shoes, and feed them sleves. Every one but you. No one can see why you can’t “Do what everyone else can”. You don’t know why you can’t do what “normal” kids can. You just know you can’t. you walk and talk just like every one else. there is no way to see an obvous reason why you can’t do it. Adults don’t know. How could they. All they can see is a kid that isn’t doing what they were told to do. And they lable you lazy, slacker, rebbel, and what ever they can come up with…….They my even point you out to your class mates and tell them not to be like you.
Rember You Have NO Idea Why You Can Not Do What The Normal Kids Do.
All you know is that no matter what, nomatter how hard you try, you just can’t do it. You will, as your only choise, beleave the adults. You must be lazy. You must really be a slacker. How could anyone be as worthless as you? the other kids susceed. They must be trying. You, there for, are not trying.
I want you to stop here and think about this senario. Where does a Child go from here? where does a Child go when they KNOW, becaues everyone tells them, they beleave with all there heart, they are worthless? Who does a Child turn to when everyone (even your parents) give up on you?
I really want you to think hard about that.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO? YOU HAVE NO REASON TO DOUBT WHAT ANYONE IS TELLING YOU. YOU HAVE NO ONE TO TURN TO. NO ONE IS TELLING YOU ANY THING POSITIVE ABOUT YOUR SELF.
This was me at ten years of age. I wanted to die. Not because I was depresed (though I’m shure I was) but because I was imbarsed to be alive. I was imbarsed for my parents, for my sisters, for my teachers. I loved them all and respected there openions. After all they could do what I could not. How could anyone deserve the burden of putting up with me?
Don’t you quit!!!
How are you going to get help? no one, not even you know the truth. you have no fingers!!! thats it. Nothing sinester about your behavior. you just don’t have any fingers!!
Your only chance will be if someone actualy sees you. and says to them self “what a nice kid. shurly if they could have tied their shoe thay would have. I wonder why they don’t?” If your luckey they will have heard of a handy cap called “nofinger” that has symptems like yours. And they will sugest that you get testing.
To parents reading think about this. How can a Child get help if the parents don’t want to help? “My Kid Is Normal!” “Not My Son!!” “My Daughter Is Just Quiet”. the world cann’t help unless you allow it. I don’t know what self centered fears parents have about children, But try and rember “a rose by anyother name would smell as sweet”. your child is alive and suffering and is a rose by any name. Any help you can give them will help them bloom. Many of my friends in the LD classes I have through out my life never were alowed to sucesed because their parents refeusd th help.
Don’t you quit!! (eather of you)
Now suppose all the politics required in getting parents, teachers and famly menbers involved come togeather and you are going to get tested.
You probably won’t know or cair about whats going on. You have spent 10 years being told and fearmly beleaving that you are just dumb and lazy. And lord knows you have seen your shair of tests. The test is a new fangled machane that takes a picture of your hand and can see what we can’t. after the test you are shown the results and have them explained to you.
you are not lazy. you just don’t have any fingers!!!!!!!
Of corse no one could tie there shoes if they didn’t have fingers!!!
Of corse no one could dress them selves if they didn’t have fingers!!!
Of corse no one could type if they didn’t have fingers!!!!!!!
I hope that helps you under stand. I finaly knew why I couldn’t tie my shoes. There was a reason. and it wasn’t because I was lazy!
I really got mad after that. I was mad at all my teachers. mad at everyone who was trusted with my life and failed! I soon (longer for others) forgave them all as They did’t know anymore than I that there was aproblem (execpet that they did’t lisson to me. But who lissons to a 10 yr old who doesn’t do what he is told). I thought that that was it! I’d just show the teachers “look here are my test results, look no fingers! I can’t type. but I can tell you the answer.”
well that didn’t happen. All, most all, of them didn’t buy it. and a few were determind to show the class and the world that I was a faker. My math teachers were indeferent. They didn’t cair about it at all. and they didn’t change anything. but at least they didn’t fight me. a few of my english teachers realy let me have it. I couldent rember the alphibet, (and still can’t!!) but had to sit in on recesse and after school to look up the spelling of words.
Now if you have no fingers how can you type? how comical would it be if you were held in the class room during recess and after school because you didn’t finish or didn’t do your typing corectly? I wasn’t laughfing then and can only find sad hummer in it now, but that was my life in the sixth grade. Dyslexiecs generaly can’t spell or do math because we revers letters and numbers. I still (as you can see) can’t spell. K through 12th grade and I was punished for not being able to spell through it all. Just as if I had no fingers and was being punished for not being able to type. The logic behind it is insane!!! I was going to flunk remadal english in the 6th grade. remeadial english is nothing but spelling. its the spelling class from hell. my teacher would make me stay in from recess and after school EVERYDAY!!!!! correcting the spelling on my test. How do you spell a unknown word? you look it up?
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